didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
That's intense
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
