at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Are we still banned from the library?
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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