So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
