I wish i was in the wii world.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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