who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
He felt like a one man threesome
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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