OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
