can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Sorry about my life...
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
