Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
