Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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