If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
found the other keg... it's in the tree
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Randomize
