no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
