i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
