I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
