there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Randomize
