she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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