Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
