What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
mondays should just be called national damage control day
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
