4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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