HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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