She went from zero to smokin in five shots
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
