So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
