i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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