and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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