i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
