hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
