Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
