no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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