i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
