You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Randomize
