I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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