i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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