Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize