so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
it was like eating out sand paper
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
