We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
