I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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