Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
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