as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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