Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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