He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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