You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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