I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
