She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
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