I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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