All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize