you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
