Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
