I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
