There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
