halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
