Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
